live without mom

my mom disapeared around 2006. when i was in grade 5, she left me with a 3 year old child whom i have to look after him. she dissapraered at kruger national park, between mopani camp and xingwedzi camp. she was with my father. after her dissapearance, we went to stay with our grand mother of our mother site, life was not easy and it is still not easy, my two families are fighting, at my mother’s site are suspecting that my father know about this issue and he was involved in the dissapearance of mom. the painful part is that my father didn’t tell me any thing about this dissapearance, instead, he left us. not supporting us. from the time i grew without mom im no longer in a good condition. it is difficult to understand because we actually dont know what happened, i always hear different stories and some tell us that she is still alive.i was stressed and im still stressed, plus i dont have support, i wish to have someone i can call mom again. for now, im suffering from panick attacks, i usually colupse, feel dizzy and have difficult breathing for 30 minutes to 1 hour. the part that im thankful at is that i am doing my second leve of my degree at university of limpopo, it was not simple for me to be hear without mom, i had none to support me and be there for me, but God Himself is the One who is taking care for me. it is not easy. i wish one day i can see my mom again or know what happened. please help me to find my mom. and if there is a mom who is offering to play a role of being a mom to me please do, i am in need of such a person. im ntwanano, a girl of 19 years old, a bornagain christian. my phone number is 0722035125. please help

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